Tag Archives: cancer diagnosis

10 Things I Wish I Had Done Before I Was Diagnosed With Cancer

I’m convinced that nothing can fully prepare a person for the impact of a cancer diagnosis, but there are still things that I wish I had done before cancer became a part of my life. As a five-year cancer survivor I now have the wisdom of hindsight, so I’ve chosen to share my definitive list of what I wish I had accomplished when I was still healthy.

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Have a Plan Regarding My Work and Income

It’s important to have a strategy in the event that you suddenly become unable to work due to illness or disability. Unfortunately I was unprepared and learned this lesson the hard way. If you’re a self-employed individual, such as a freelancer or independent contractor, you may be especially vulnerable if circumstances ever render you unable to work for the long-term.

Go Out and Experience New Things

When I was still in good health, I made too many excuses about why I couldn’t go out to events or experience new things. I’m basically an introvert and prefer to stay in, it’s for couples only, I can’t afford it, the transportation and commute are too much of a hassle were some of the issues I’d focus on when ruling out gatherings or events.

Be More Physically Active

I regret not going for long walks or spending more time outdoors in the years leading up to my cancer diagnosis. Science has essentially proven that people who are active have an advantage compared to those who don’t exercise. Active individuals tend to live longer, healthier lives than their sedentary counterparts.

Purchase a Disability Insurance Plan

This is something I really regret not taking care of and I strongly urge anyone without this type of insurance to look into a plan. The only alternative to private insurance if you suddenly become chronically ill or disabled is most often government assistance.

Listen to My Body

Ovarian cancer is sometimes called the “silent killer” because its symptoms are often subtle or mimic other less serious illnesses. It’s important to know what is normal for your body and to be alert to any changes that might indicate a problem. I wish I had been more in tune with my body and more persistent with my doctors.

Develop a Support Network

When I was diagnosed with cancer I quickly realized that my social support network is very small. Specifically, I’m single, come from a small family of origin and have few close friends. I understand that some of this isn’t under my control, but I definitely wish I had been more diligent about building a network when I was still healthy.

Pay More Attention to My Relationships

If you have conflicts in your family relationships or have simply drifted apart, I suggest you reach out to repair whatever damage might have occurred over the years. Once you are diagnosed with a chronic illness you suddenly comprehend the value of having strong bonds with family members, including your parents, spouse, siblings and children.

Be Prepared For People’s Reactions

When people learned of my cancer diagnosis their reactions sometimes caused me resentment, frustration or anger. They meant well, but I could have been more prepared for their sometimes inappropriate remarks and gestures. Many individuals are misinformed about the scientific facts surrounding cancer or don’t know how to properly reach out to a friend who has been diagnosed with the disease.

Catch Up on Things I’ve Let Slide

We all have a tendency to procrastinate or push tasks and projects to the back burner. When I became ill I suddenly realized how many things were left undone and how many loose ends I should have tied up. If you have been meaning to buy some essential new pieces for your wardrobe, need new glasses or need to get your car or computer serviced, do it now!

Establish an Outlet For Anger and Grief

The universal emotions for nearly all cancer patients are anger and grief—intense anger that can border on rage and a grief that can feel like a bottomless well of despair. To maintain your emotional health you’ll need an outlet for these feelings. It might be a friend, therapist or support group, but it’s important to have someone that you can confide in without fear of judgment

 

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Because it’s 2016: A New Era for Cancer Patients

Few doctors in this country seem to be involved with the non-life-threatening side effects of cancer therapy. In the United States, baldness, nausea and vomiting, diarrhea, clogged veins, financial problems, broken marriages, disturbed children, loss of libido, loss of self-esteem, and body image are nurses’ turf.

Rose Kushner

One of the most stunning realizations that I’ve had since being diagnosed with cancer is how much cancer impacts the whole person—the disease can undermine almost every aspect of a person’s life. The field of oncology acknowledges this, at least more than it did four decades ago when American journalist Rose Kushner spoke these words. Today most cancer patients, including myself, have access to social workers, psychologists, dieticians and other skilled professionals. Treating the whole person and recognizing that each patient has unique issues and needs have become firmly entrenched and are part of the philosophy of cancer care.

At my cancer centre there are now two forms that patients are asked to fill out at every checkup. The first contains questions to gage a patient’s physical wellbeing as they go thorough treatment, but a second questionnaire was recently added. This latest form is used to gather information about the various psychosocial issues that are associated with cancer. Certain social, financial or mental health issues may need to be addressed. While I sometimes resent having to answer what I consider highly personal questions, I realize the importance of asking cancer patients about almost every aspect of their lives.

 

Research Breakthroughs

 

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Dr. Barbara Vanderhyden, one of Canada’s preeminent ovarian cancer researchers, recalls that when she began her work she was one of the only people in Canada researching the disease. Over a decade ago Vanderhyden started the Canadian Conference on Ovarian Cancer Research and now the community has grown from three people to more than 60 ovarian cancer researchers across the country. This flourishing research community has led to a number of recent discoveries. For instance, it is now known that ovarian cancer is not one disease but a spectrum of diseases with different responses to treatment.

I’m frequently amazed at the lightening speed at which new cancer treatments are being discovered and implemented. For example, immunotherapy is an emerging approach to treatment that boosts the immune response to cancer. It enables the body to target and destroy cancer cells. There are three main areas of immunotherapy that are showing promise.

  • Vaccines that enhance immune system response
  • Inhibitors that affect how the immune system regulates itself
  • Adoptive T-cell transfer, which removes a patient’s cancer-fighting T-cells and activates them before returning them to the bloodstream

Although gynecological cancers, such as mine, have seen only modest breakthroughs in immunotherapy, melanoma and lung cancer are areas that are witnessing great progress.

 

New Targeted Treatments

 

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According to many scientists a new era of cancer treatment is beginning in which patients get drugs matched specifically to their tumour. Patients experience longer survival and fewer toxic effects through this approach, which is being made possible by advances in genetic profiling of the tumour itself. Conventional chemotherapy and radiation treatments have both short-term and long-term side effects and can be absolutely brutal for patients to endure. These treatments kill a significant number of healthy cells in addition to the cancer cells. “At the moment it’s more like using a cannonball to kill an ant – and creating a whole lot of damage at the same time,” explains professor Roy Herbst, chief of medical oncology at Yale Cancer Centre.

Meanwhile a UK trial, called Optima, is being run by University College London and Cambridge University and funded by Cancer Research UK. Beginning this summer, it will recruit 4,500 women with breast cancer. The women’s tumours will be genetically tested as soon as they are diagnosed to establish which will respond to chemotherapy and which will not. Of the 50,000 or so women diagnosed with breast cancer in the UK each year, about 40 per cent, or 20,000, are currently given chemotherapy but only half of them do well as a result of it; in the other half, the benefit is unclear. The researchers hope to find out which of the latter group actually need chemotherapy. As one oncologist emphasized: “In some ways it is simple – it means that you can make sure you are giving the right drug to the right person at the right time. In others it is very complex, because there are so many pieces to the jigsaw. We need to put the puzzle together.”

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Relying on the Web: What Cancer Patients Should Know

When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I entered a psychological realm where wanting to know everything about the disease alternated with fear and aversion. Numb and in shock, I would often read over my three-page pathology report, using various websites to meticulously research the strange and frightening terminology it contained.

I’m not alone in feeling this way or in turning to the Internet for help. Nearly half of all Canadian adults are asking questions about cancer, and most turn first to the web for information. The problem is that this self-research is leaving many cancer patients confused, overwhelmed and stressed out. Although we tend to use the Internet as our first resource, most of us don’t have strong faith in the information that it provides.

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According to a new survey commissioned by the Canadian Cancer Society, when it comes to getting definitive cancer information, doctors and healthcare professionals are trusted by 94 per cent of Canadians. In spite of that only eight per cent of Canadians contacted their healthcare team first with questions. Similarly, cancer organizations and charities are trusted by 87 per cent of those seeking information, but less than five per cent of Canadians searching for cancer information reached out to them. People are more skeptical of online sources with only 69 per cent trusting the information. Despite their uncertainty, 85 per cent of people with cancer questions first turned to a search engine.

Why do Canadians so frequently consult the web for information about cancer if they place more confidence in their oncologist and organizations such as the Canadian Cancer Society? According to the survey, convenience is an issue. While the web is easily accessible, more than half of respondents said it is challenging to get time to speak with their healthcare team. But ease of use comes with unexpected side effects. Two-thirds of Internet users felt overwhelmed with information, and 62 per cent felt stressed out and worried, jumping to 70 per cent among Canadians 18 to 34.

There are several alternatives to randomly searching the web that I would strongly recommend.

Use Only Reliable Internet Sites

My cancer facility, the Tom Baker Cancer Centre in Calgary, provides patients with a list of recommend websites. Here are a few of the most essential ones.

American Cancer Society
Canadian Cancer Society
National Cancer Institute
CancerNet
Oncolink

Use The Canadian Cancer Society’s Cancer Information Service

IMG_0117Since 1996, the Canadian Cancer Society has answered 1,250,000 questions through its Cancer Information Service. The Society’s toll-free bilingual Cancer Information Service can be reached at 1-888-939-3333. Assistance is available to cancer patients, caregivers, the general public and healthcare professionals. An information specialist will take all the time you need to answer your questions and provide you with information on the following topics:

  • cancer treatment and side effects
  • clinical trials
  • coping with cancer
  • emotional support services
  • prevention
  • help in the community
  • complementary therapies

The Canadian Cancer Society’s phone line is available during business hours Monday to Friday. You should also note that when you contact the Cancer Information Service for help, your privacy is protected and you will not be asked for donations or put on a mailing list.

Access Support Organizations for Your Specific Cancer Type

Instead of randomly searching the Internet try connecting with an organization that specializes in providing support to individuals with your type of cancer. For example, staff in Ovarian Cancer Canada’s regional offices are available to answer your questions and to provide support via telephone or email. Ovarian Cancer Canada hosts webinars, workshops and events that are relevant to women living with the disease. You can also listen to various educational recordings on their YouTube channel.

Finally, Ovarian Cancer Canada offers a comprehensive guide to support and inform women who have been newly diagnosed with ovarian cancer. The publication is called By Your Side and printed copies of this resource are provided free of charge across Canada. You can Order By Your Side by filling out an online form or by calling 1-877-413-7970 (toll free).

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Exploring Cancer’s Realm

Illness is the night-side of life, a more onerous citizenship. Everyone who is born holds duel citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the sick. Although we all prefer to use only the good passport, sooner or later each of us is obliged, at least for a spell, to identify ourselves as citizens of that other place.

— Susan Sontag

As a cancer survivor I often feel like I’m an outsider trying to fit into the world I once occupied, the world of the healthy and cancer free. My cancer diagnosis has caused me to view the world differently—for example many things that once seemed enormously important have lost significance and become almost trivial. I’ve discovered that physical attractiveness, material possessions and social status all matter less to me now. Not surprisingly, these things frequently seem to fade into irrelevance as I confront a life-threatening illness. The realm of cancer is teeming with complex, and sometimes even existential, topics. Healthy individuals are able to carry on with day-to-day trivialities, but I’ve had to stop in order to reflect on some of the deeper questions that others have the luxury of ignoring. Since being informed that I have cancer I’ve discovered that I can no longer defer life’s existential questions. Why am I here? What is the purpose of my life? Who am I?

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Susan Sontag was an American writer and commentator on modern culture. She published essays, novels, and short stories. Sontag explored society’s attitudes toward cancer in her work Illness as Metaphor.

Regrettably, I’ve learned that our society still has misperceptions about chronic illnesses, such as cancer, and that there is still indignity for those of us living with such conditions. This legacy isn’t surprising considering the profound fear, confusion and stigma surrounding cancer for centuries. Until relatively recently the word was hardly spoken in public or said out loud. In 1978 Susan Sontag wrote the classic, and still controversial work, Illness as Metaphor. A breast cancer patient herself when she was authoring the book, Sontag argues that the metaphors and myths surrounding certain illnesses add greatly to the suffering of patients and frequently inhibit them from seeking proper treatment. By demystifying the fantasies surrounding cancer, Sontag strives to show cancer for what it is—just a disease. Cancer, she argues, is not a curse, not a punishment, certainly not an embarrassment, and it is often highly curable if good treatment is followed.

It’s no wonder that some cancer patients still choose to avoid revealing their illness to others. Some don’t want to be viewed differently. They just want to be normal, not defined by the disease. Others may choose to stay silent to protect their privacy and emotional stability. When the news broke last month that musical legend David Bowie had died at the age of 69 after an 18-month battle with cancer, fans around the world expressed not just grief but shock. Despite more than five decades on the world stage, under the glare of a public spotlight, the rock-and-roll icon managed to keep his cancer journey a secret from fans and friends alike, sharing it only with a handful of people in his inner circle.

simulator

Sometimes when people are diagnosed, they receive a lot of advice from friends, family members or others—virtually everyone has known someone with a form of the disease. Often the intentions are good, but the stories can be scary and frequently make a patient feel worse. When a sizeable network of people learned that I had been diagnosed with uterine and ovarian cancer, I received information that was both inappropriate and that increased my anxiety. I was inundated with everything from holistic remedies for cancer to stories about aunt so-and-so’s bowel cancer. Keeping a diagnosis a secret keeps these kinds of opinions away.

Ultimately when my cancer became common knowledge, there was another aspect that I found emotionally unsettling. The moment family members, friends and acquaintances learned about my illness, all of a sudden, it wasn’t about me anymore. To a large extent it became about trying to make sure my mother, who was in the role of my caregiver, was okay. She had a reliable network that was concerned about her and that wanted to make certain that she wasn’t becoming too overwhelmed or too upset. I don’t resent the support that was provided to my mom, but at the time I remember being a little envious. It made me more keenly aware that I don’t possess a large number of close friends myself; it also became slightly harder for me to focus on my own emotional issues and specific needs.

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Lessons in Survivorship: The Wisdom of Cancer

PurpleRainAs I’ve mentioned before in this blog, self-assessment or the need to reprioritize your life is a virtually inevitable part of being a cancer survivor. This month marks the fourth anniversary of my diagnosis. My gynecologist informed me of my disease on November 3, 2011, and this will always remain one of the most significant days of my life. How can one explain such a profound and life-altering event to a person who has always been relatively healthy? Some psychologists and experts have observed that cancer patients divide their lives into two parts or that we are figuratively born twice.

Since the beginning of my cancer experience there have been moments of epiphany and numerous opportunities for personal reflection. I want to share a few of the survivorship lessons that I’ve come to terms with over the past four years. According to professionals in the cancer field, survivorship is living with and beyond cancer. Survivorship covers the physical, psychosocial, and economic issues of cancer, from diagnosis until the end of life. This is some of what I’ve learned so far.

If something isn’t going to matter or have any impact five years from now, I probably shouldn’t spend time worrying about the issue. Not until my diagnosis with cancer did I realize how much time I spend worrying about the future or regretting the past. I believe more than ever in the importance of focusing my attention on the present. I can live each moment only once, so why waste that precious moment in a state of self-induced stress or anxiety? As for the direction of my life, I’ve ultimately gained a clearer perspective about what my priorities are—I’m proud of my ability to concentrate on the values and relationships that I know are the most significant.

I tend to enjoy my own company more than I enjoy being in groups or socializing with other people. I’ve accepted that I’m an introvert and there’s nothing wrong with the way I am, it’s not necessary for me to apologize. I lament the fact that my personality type is so frequently misunderstood and that introversion is often confused with being shy. Shyness is the fear of negative judgment, and introversion is a preference for quiet, minimally stimulating environments. I become the most upset when I’m accused of disliking people in general and of lacking the skills to be an extrovert. The truth is that introverts comprise at least one quarter of the population and we continue to make our own unique contributions to society.

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It’s counterproductive to surround myself with people who don’t want to be with me or don’t value me. I’ve reached a point on my cancer journey where I find it’s no longer necessary to impress anyone. If they like me the way I am, that’s fine. If they don’t, it’s their loss.

I’ve definitely developed zero tolerance for having toxic people in my life.

Some Signs of a Toxic Person

Nothing you can say or do is good enough.
They comment on the smallest flaw or perceived imperfection.
They drag up your past and won’t allow you to grow or be different.
They act like they are fabulous and never make mistakes.
They leave you feeling guilty and ashamed of who you are.
They are critical, controlling and don’t think about your needs.
They leave you feeling beaten, wounded, battered bruised and torn.
They violate your boundaries and never respect no.
They don’t care about your feelings and they like to see you suffer.
It’s always about them and what they think and want and feel.

I never use the phrase someday and I try to avoid talking about future plans in vague or uncertain terms. Most people I know take the future for granted and think of it as something that will always be there for them. In 2012 I spent over a month and a half on Unit 42 at Calgary’s Foothills Hospital. This women’s cancer ward is predominately a place of bravery, triumph, heartbreak and tears. When I looked into some of the other patients’ eyes, I could see them begging for a future, and I understood that they would do almost anything for the gift of just a few more months in this world. As a cancer survivor I’ve discovered how precarious tomorrow really is and that you can’t always depend on someday.

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I’ve learned it’s not wrong to put my own needs first and that it’s essential to take care of myself physically and emotionally. After undergoing five cycles of chemotherapy and three cancer surgeries within eight months—I’m finally treating my body with the respect it deserves. We’re all pressured daily to move faster, do more, sleep less, earn more money and obtain that promotion. Within the cancer community, I hear the term “self-care” a lot. I don’t know if I’m fond of the expression, but it’s a concept I believe in strongly, I consider it particularly relevant for women with cancer. As women we are socially encouraged to give everyone else our time, energy and attention—but often feel conflicted or guilty when we stop long enough to take equally thoughtful care of ourselves.

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How to Slay the Dragon: Fear, Anxiety and Cancer

guiltFear is one of my constant companions on this cancer journey, for nearly four years now it has attempted to overcome me and prevent me from living the life I want. Naturally, when I was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer and saw my pathology report a series of unsettling questions raced through my mind. Consulting with a team of oncologists at Calgary’s Baker Centre only seemed to increase my anxiety over my condition. Will the recommended treatment be successful or will I die? Will undergoing another major surgery followed by chemotherapy be too agonizing and unbearable? Now that my oncologist has informed me that I’m in remission, it’s the fear of my cancer recurring that I have to cope with on a daily basis.

In this post I’d like to share several of the best techniques that I’ve discovered for cancer survivors to master their fear and not let it control them.

Remember That Your Journey is Unique

Most women with ovarian cancer have at least one relapse within five years of being diagnosed, but I frequently remind myself that this standard rate of recurrence won’t necessary happen to me. The reality is that medical science has established that all cancer patients are unique. What’s more, because cancer statistics are based on large samples of people, they cannot be used to predict exactly what will happen to a single individual. Everyone is different. Treatments and how people respond to treatment can differ greatly. I strongly suggest trying to follow these essential rules:

  1. Resist the temptation to compare the disease in your body to what is happening to other people, even in situations when the type or stage of cancer is highly similar.
  2. Don’t dwell on statistics or the possibility of recurrence.

Practice Mindfulness

I’ve discovered that one of the best ways to quiet my mind and focus my attention is a technique called mindfulness. Jon Kabat-Zinn pioneered using this method with cancer patients and other groups battling chronic pain or illness at the University of Massachusetts Medical School. Mindfulness is basically just a way of paying attention, a way of awakening our minds and being present in the here and now. With principles found in Buddhism, mindfulness teaches us to live moments in each day rather than focusing on what might lie ahead.

Acceptance and letting go are crucial components of mindfulness. A philosophy of mindfulness encourages us to come to terms with our life, even difficult experiences such as a cancer diagnosis. Acceptance means seeing things as they actually are in the present. Mindfulness doesn’t require that you have to like your situation—you don’t necessarily have to assume a passive attitude toward suffering or life’s unfairness. However, you must come to terms with things as they are and acknowledge them, whether it’s a diagnosis of cancer or the possibility of its recurrence in the future.

Appreciate the Joys of Nature

K-Country

It’s generally agreed that exposure to nature is extremely beneficial for people with cancer or other chronic illnesses, improving mood and easing anxiety, stress, and depression. Current research findings suggest that natural settings such as parks, wilderness areas, urban green spaces and gardens have the potential to improve both physical and mental health. Numerous health scholars claim that ecotherapy can promote wellness and healing. The practice is also known as green therapy, nature therapy, and earth-centered therapy.

Take Part in Exercise or Physical Activity

Studies have proven the benefits of exercise for cancer patients. Of course, vigorous physical activity might not be possible during treatment and you should always consult with your doctor before beginning an exercise program. It will take more effort to become active if you were accustomed to a sedentary lifestyle before your cancer diagnosis. Many people feel so excited about “getting healthy” that they try to do multiple things at once, and that’s a recipe for burnout. Try focusing on just one type of exercise first. Some research indicates that a behavior change is more likely to ensue when you’ve identified what you really want from it. You may be seeking better moods or stress relief, or maybe you just want to connect with a fellow cancer survivor or workout buddy—it doesn’t matter, as long as you know what your goals are.

Have at Least One Regular Hobby

Secret-Garden

There’s an emerging group of professionals who employ the arts to help people heal. The new field is called creative arts therapies, and it encompasses a wide range of modes of expression including art, dance/movement, drama, music and poetry. When cancer patients undertake these activities, whether individually or with the guidance of a creative art therapist, they stand to benefit psychologically and emotionally. Recently there’s been a trend toward simple or old-fashioned crafts and hobbies such as knitting. Some adults are even using colouring books to relax and reduce daily stress. This concept started several years ago with the publication of Johanna Basford’s Secret Garden. Her colouring book for adults has since been translated into 14 languages and has sold over one million copies.

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It’s All So Trivial: Emotional Isolation and Cancer Patients

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In my introductory blog post, Survivorship 101, I defined the concept of cancer survivorship. Survivorship refers to the physical, psychological, social, and economic issues of living with cancer, from diagnosis until the end of life. In this post I would like to delve deeper into some of the social and psychological aspects of having cancer. For example, a major cancer diagnosis often causes you to view the world differently—things that once seemed enormously important may lose significance and become almost trivial. Personally, I’ve discovered that physical attractiveness, material possessions and social status all matter less to me now. These things frequently seem to fade into irrelevance as I confront a life-threatening illness. Meanwhile, my relationships with other people, discovering ways that I can make a difference in the world and learning more about the essence of who I am are currently at the forefront of my agenda and have an extremely high priority to me at the moment.

Like many people dealing with cancer I’ve sometimes felt isolated from those not going through a similar experience. Relatives, friends and acquaintances mean well, but they are unable to fully empathize or to understand certain aspects of what I am going through. Many cancer survivors will attest to the fact that there are times when they are surrounded by people and still feel very alone. This type of emotional isolation occurs when you discover that you can no longer relate to people in the same way you did before. Things that were important to you in the past are no longer important to you, and your friends and family don’t understand why you have changed so much. I’ve noticed that the books I read, the movies or television that I watch and the activities that I like to participate in have all changed a fair amount since my cancer diagnosis, so have the topics that I prefer to discuss. This transformation has affected my personal relationships and how I feel about those closest to me.

loneliness bench

According to the Alberta CancerBridges team, such deep-seated feelings of isolation have been well documented in the cancer care literature. There is even a term that has been created to describe this experience—it’s known as survivor loneliness. Last summer I watched a rare long-term survivor of ovarian cancer address the crowd at an Ovarian Cancer Canada fundraiser. I admire her ability to speak eloquently in public about her decade long struggle. Throughout her speech she had nothing but praise for her friends and family, I could sense that she is profoundly grateful for the unconditional love and support that they have given her over the years. But paradoxically, the former nurse also characterized her personal battle with cancer as a “long lonely journey.” Survivor loneliness can take many forms and occur for a number of reasons. It’s typically felt as a profound sense of isolation from the people around you. As one battles cancer, this sense of isolation can arise from a feeling that you are alone in your awareness of mortality.

Since my cancer diagnosis two years ago, I’ve been required to think about my mortality. I’ve also had to tend to many practical matters that I didn’t anticipate that I’d have to deal with until I was much older. While everyone around me carries on with their lives, I’ve had to stop and reflect on some of the deeper questions of life that others have the luxury of ignoring. Individuals diagnosed with cancer often find themselves contemplating existential questions. Why am I here? What is the purpose of my life? Who am I? These issues are brought to the forefront of your mind when facing a potentially deadly disease. Sometimes I feel frustrated by the fact that most things that my friends and family care about seem fairly trivial to me now. For example, they got cut off in traffic, they had a disagreement with a coworker or their favorite esthetics studio is getting ready to raise its prices.

Cancer experts and psychologists generally agree that the most effective way to combat isolation and survivor loneliness is to connect with other people who are undergoing a similar ordeal. There are numerous support groups and organizations throughout Canada specializing in the extremely complex social and emotional aspects of cancer.

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Cancer shakes your illusions of immortality. It robs you of the sense of invincibility and innocence that once protected you. But what replaces that feeling is infinitely more valuable: a new awareness and a mature understanding of both life and death.

From Picking Up the Pieces: Moving Forward After Surviving Cancer
by Sherri Magee and Kathy Scalzo

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