Are You Sure?

“Are you sure, sweetheart, that you want to be well?… Just so’s you’re sure, sweetheart, and ready to be healed, cause wholeness is no trifling matter. A lot of weight when you’re well.”

The Salt Eaters by Toni Cade Bambara

I recently came across this intriguing quote when I saw it posted by a friend on Facebook. The Salt Eaters, the novel from which the passage is taken, explores the narcissistic aspect of despair and the tremendous responsibility that comes with physical, spiritual, and mental well-being. As a cancer survivor, I can definitely relate to this topic. To me being in good health is a privilege, a gift that we have a responsibility to nurture. Considering issues such as the obligations of wellness, if someone with supernatural healing abilities offered me the opportunity to be in perfect health I sometimes wonder what I would do. Would I simply choose to go back to my life as it was before my cancer diagnosis?

The-Salt-EatersI’ve almost forgotten the me I was before I had cancer. It’s hard to remember how different I was before having my uterus and ovaries removed, before the surgery scars that now adorn my abdomen. There are some things that have remained the same, but there are also many aspects of my life that are different. As hard as I concentrate, I can’t really remember my old normal. Was there really a time when I had never been inside a cancer centre or had an appointment with an oncologist? I can only vaguely bring to mind a time when my days were not fine-tuned to accommodate the physical, psychological and emotional demands that come with being a cancer survivor. My disease has required me to change in both positive and negative ways, it has beyond a doubt transformed me.

The Salt Eaters is set in a small town in the Southern States. According to one synopsis, Velma Henry, a long-time civil rights activist and feminist, sits in a hospital gown on a stool listening to the musical voice of Minnie Ransom. Old Minnie is a healer; she heals people by contacting the points of physical or psychical pain in her patients and relieving them. Scars heal and wounds close in minutes under her touch. Velma requires Minnie’s help because she has just attempted to kill herself after becoming overwhelmed by the tedious fight for change that never comes. Her healing takes a long time, for the old mystic must first be convinced that Velma truly wants to be cured. Throughout the novel the two women are surrounded by tourists, doctors, and passers-by. They are in a clinic that focuses on traditional medicines of all kinds. The author describes the inner-healing process of Velma, the efforts of Minnie and the thoughts of people looking on or associated with the scene.

Chemotherapy-drip

Sometimes I wish a mystic healer like the fictional Minnie Ransom could transport me back to before I had cancer, but then I think that I’ve come too far and acquired too much. In the seven years since my cancer diagnosis, I’ve realized how fortunate I am. I’ve been reminded that often, in our worst challenges come valuable lessons. Through facing the terrible realities of my disease, I’ve learned to be more conscious of living in the moment. I’ve learned it’s all right to pause in our hyper-accelerated culture, I’m allowed to take a break when I’m feeling worn-out. My new normal has also taught me I don’t need material things to make me happy and that family and friends are to be treasured. But perhaps the most valuable lesson I’ve acquired so far during my cancer journey is that life is all too short.

Finally, many critics of The Salt Eaters like that the novel presents an alternative view of medicine and its relationship to pain. I’m intrigued with the author’s view that pain is not a symptom, but the problem itself. In the book healing comes from within the patient, guided by Minnie rather than through treatment from the outside. In today’s world it is also more relevant than ever that the novel situates illness in a socio-historical realm. Velma is sick because of racial and sexual injustice. Others in the novel are obsessed with nuclear waste, chemical leaks, lead pipes and their potential health hazards. Nearly forty years after The Salt Eaters was published scientific studies continue to demonstrate the various links between our external environment and our internal health.

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